I can count!

Hello, here I am again, and I have some very exciting news:  I have learnt to count. Yes, it’s true. And I’m going to prove it right now.

Here I go.

One, two, COME ON, HELP US OUT!!!! four, five, DO NOT TAKE THAT!!! seven, eight, PUT IT DOWN!!! ten.

How about that? I can count all the way to ten. I learnt to do it the other day after I took one of Big Boss’s socks from the washing basket. I mean, how could I refuse? It was sitting on top of a pile of clothes that Bald Boss had just taken off the swingy thingy in the backyard. Everything smelt so lovely, and I knew it was my duty to put something in my mouth and chew it as soon as I could. I was very lucky because normally Bald Boss puts the clothes basket out of my reach in the fork of a tree, but he was too busy talking to some magpies to realise he’d left the basket on the ground. So, when he turned his back on me, I did my best work. But Bald Boss soon saw me, and he immediately said: ‘Roger, drop it! I’ll give you ten seconds, ok, buddy?’ And then he counted to 10. And that’s how I came to learn my numbers. Here, I’ll say them again:

One, two, COME ON, HELP US OUT!!!! four, five, DO NOT TAKE THAT!!! seven, eight, PUT IT DOWN!!! ten.

There you go.

I’m very proud of myself. Sometimes (in fact, a LOT of times), I put other things in my mouth too: shoes, empty milk bottles, caps, boxes, sticks, flowers, pencils…and now, I have fun by counting to ten while I hold them.

I’m learning so much. It’s amazing!

The other day, Big Boss said to me: ‘Roger, you ear is inside out.’ I had no idea what an ear was, but I soon found out because I heard Boy Boss tell one of his friends that I wasn’t yet an ear old. Boy Boss said: ‘Roger isn’t yet an ear old.’ And that’s when I worked out what an ear is. An ear is something that tells us how old we are. You can be one ear old, or two ear old, or COME ON, HELP US OUT ear old, or four ear old… Goodness, I have learnt so much. But I’m still a little confused about how and why my ear could be inside out. I think Big Boss must have made a mistake. I wish I could tell her. Maybe when I am older, maybe when I’m PUT IT DOWN ear old, I will be able to bark more words at her, and she will be able to understand. I think Big Boss has a lot to learn too. We all do.

I’m tired.

I need a sleep.

Wags from afar,

Roger.